future PR difficult
I closed with an overall pace of 10:29, much better than I expected. According to official splits, at the halfway mark I was still under 10 minutes per mile, the rhythm I have sustained through all my races so far.
I am proud of my time, but I do not understand why I pushed so hard. I was convinced I would walk a great part of the way. I was prepared to walk. I believed I could not do it without walking.
I thought I would run the second time around. In my next marathon.
Instead I ran, at least as far as the legs would take me. It did not occur to me I would have enjoyed the course more if I had forced myself less. I raced, as if this were the last race on earth.
It is obvious to me I am not at a level of fitness, or even ambition, to overtake other runners out there. I can only surpass myself. And yet, I succumb to this visceral need to run faster, to be better, to be now.
posted by runliarun @ 7:43 AM
10 Comments:
> I can only surpass myself.
Great attitude!
"Don't bother just to be better than your contemporaries or predecessors. Try to be better than yourself."
- William Faulkner
As you surpass yourself Lia you will see your body passing others, the ones that don't have the drive and commitment that you have. Your attitude is addictive. I'm not scheduled to run my first marathon until either December of this year or January of '08, but I'm not sure I can wait that long. I'm running two other HM's this fall, maybe one of those would be the inaugral one for me.
"I can only surpass myself." Ah, the battle of most every runner I know. It's so much a metaphor for all of life, this running thing.
I think you are about to be shocked even more about what you're capable of accomplishing in your running. I'm glad I get to read about it!
We always push harder in races, and the adreneline from the marathon probably pushed you to exceed your expectations.
I'm guessing it felt right in the moment - given that it seems that not until afterwards did you even realize you did it.
What a great post. Thanks for the nice comment on my blog today.
They really get easier, the more you do them. And frankly, neither of us is ever going to be world-class fast, so we find our motivations elsewhere.
Mine is that when I pass mile 20, I feel like I'm in my mother's arms. There is no place that feels so much like home to me as that place around mile 21 or beyond.
May you find your promised land too.
I think our biggest competitor is ourselves. That is what pushes us the most.
Then we find a way to 'surpass ourselves,' Then we push again.
I think you did "surpass" yourself at the marathon. You did great.
Lia,
I think that need to prove something to our selves is what drives all of us. It has certainly pushed me lately - in the "I may not be fast, but I can improve and I can stack them up" kind of way. And it is so satisfying when you prove it to yourself!
You did great! And continue to better yourself, that is what makes you stronger.
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